These are a few of my favorite things

Well people have been asking for this for a while, so here it is:

Joseph's Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe (Single Batch)

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees and bring out a medium bowl, and a large mixer. With the mixer use either cookie or dough beaters, but not wire beaters because this recipe is too thick for them and will ruin them. Ungreased Cookie Sheets (I recommend two per oven), a rubber Spatula or equivalent, a Standard Spatula for removing your cookies, and a place to put your cookies while they cool and "degrease" (I recommend a Newspaper covered by paper towels).

Gather the following ingredients:
2.25 cups of Flour (You choose, but I use enriched unbleached flour)
1 teaspoon Baking Soda (Not Baking Powder)
1 teaspoon Salt (I use regular iodized salt)
1 Cup Shortening (Crisco)
3/4 Cup Granulated Sugar
3/4 Cup light Brown Sugar (I recommend not using dark, because a slight molasses flavor will come through)
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 large chicken eggs
1/2 12oz bag of Semi Sweet Chocolate chips (I usually double this recipe, and Semi Sweet Chocolate Chips are the best tasting in a cookie, Milk Chocolate is too sweet and has the wrong Texture)

To begin take the Flour, Salt and Baking Soda, and combine (you don't have to mix) them in the medium bowl. Set them aside and in the large mixing bowl put the Crisco, Brown Sugar, Granulated sugar, and lastly Vanilla in the large mixing bowl, and turn you mixer to low. As the mixer beats add, one at a time, the eggs. Once the eggs are mixed in to the dough scrape down the sides with your Rubber Spatula to make sure that all the ingredients will mix together. Now increase the speed of you mixer to Medium High (this should be quite fast), and beat the mixture until it is a light brown smooth mixture (the color should be close to a rootbeer milkshake and it should look like a thick milkshake).

Turn off your mixer and get your bowl of flour/salt/soda. Turn you mixer to low again (and if you have a kitchen-aide mixer now is a good time to engage the lock) and slowly add the flour/salt/soda mixture to the bowl. Make sure the dough in the bowl is completely mixed, once it is add all of the chocolate chips (you can do this in one go) and mix until the Chocolate Chips are well distributed.

Take the mixture and put it on your cookie sheets about 1-1.5 inch well spaced globs. Take the Cookie Sheet and put it in the oven from 6-9 minutes (the first batch takes the longest, usually 8 minutes, subsequent batches are about 7 minutes). Remove the cookies from the oven at the slightest hint of brown (this hint is usually at the edges of the cookies, and will not show on all of the cookies. If you see any cookies with any brown, they are now done) let the cookies cool for about a minute before removing them from the cookie sheet to your cooling station. Repeat until your cookie mix is exhausted (makes approximately 4 dozen cookies, depending upon how much cookie dough is eaten before they are cooked).

Joe's Burger Sauce (all of these measurements are approximates)

1/4 Cup Terayaki sauce (I recommend Mr. Yoshida's Terayaki sauce)
2 Teaspoons Onion Powder
1 Teaspoon Garlic Salt
5-8 drops Red Tabasco Sauce
1 Teaspoon Crushed red Chiles
1 Teaspoon Black Pepper

Mix all of these in a small bowl and use as a wet rub on top of your burgers while they cook.

Joe's Honey Mustard (All of these measurements are approximates)
1/2 Cup Yellow Mustard
4 Tablespoons Barbecue Sauce (Hickory brown sugar sauce)
4 Tablespoons Honey (I use Clover Honey)
Some Black Pepper for Taste and color
6-9 drops Red Tabasco Sauce

Mix in a small covered container and refrigerate for 12 hours for best flavors. If the recipe isn't sweet enough add more honey, if it tastes too much like mustard add more Barbecue sauce. I use this recipe to dip chicken into.